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Me: Erin. Erin. I was thinking about the hypothetical JCS production again.
Like, a lot.
What if Mary Magdalene has lots and lots of friendship bracelets as part of her outfit...
...and all of the Apostles noticeably are also wearing one?
Except Judas, because he wouldn't wear his. Alternately, she tries to give him one during "Everything's Alright," but he just stares at her.
Alternately-alternately, he just stares at her, then notices Jesus watching, and grudgingly lets her put one on his wrist.
Her: :o I see!
...Judas doesn't want one, then sees Jesus take one, then begrudgingly accepts one
Me: Yes, yes good, because Jesus is a good bro and would happily accept Mary's bracelet.
And I've been thinking more about hoodie!Jesus, and the idea is really growing on me.
Like Jesus's outfit consists entirely of this big white hoodie that's AT LEAST two sizes too big, and worn-out jeans with the knees ripped out, and Birkenstocks, because I have a lot of feelings about Jesus in Birkenstocks.
And the overall effect is he looks kind of sloppy, but also SUPER-approachable and cuddly. Maybe ALL of the Apostles look like they got their clothes out of a Goodwill dumpster, except for Judas.
I mean, Judas doesn't need to be a full-on Gucci-douche or anything, but he's noticeably more put-together than the rest of them, because I always feel like people ought to work that "he MIGHT be skimming off the top of the treasury" bit in there, somewhere. And then Jesus can be pointedly referring to his outfit with the "look at the good things YOU'VE got," after he tries to call Mary out as a dumb wasteful hooker with the perfume.
Her: ...I am definitely here for a cuddly Jesus.
Me: He is the CUDDLIEST Jesus. He heals with HUGS.
...also at least one Apostle ruffles Judas's hair during "What's the Buzz?" and Judas just pulls a comb out of his pocket and starts grumpily tidying himself up.
Her: If he heals with hugs, no wonder he gets so overwhelmed when everyone wants healing.
Me: The hugs get very frazzled by the time he's covered in lepers.
And maybe Jesus rarely puts the hood up, maybe it's like a security blanket thing where he pulls it up when he's stressed-out, like right before the lepers show up while he's singing "my time is almost through..." And at the start of "The Last Supper," but he ends up shoving it off again right before he starts calling out Apostles.
And it's up when they drag him in to see Pilate the first time, just so somebody can yank it off to present him to Pilate as "Someone Christ, King of the Jews."
Her: Ooh, yes.
Me: SPEAKING OF PILATE: Okay, we already discussed wanting him dressed like Treize Khushrenada but in Tyrian purple, yes?
What if when they first bring in Jesus, he's behind one of those huge, ornate desks, more or less hip-deep in paperwork?
And they bring in Jesus, and he's just like, "...really? Really? I'm swamped and you bring me a scruffy hobo to deal with? Just...take him to Herod, or something; I've got stuff to do."
But when they bring him back, Pilate's got the cape on, and probably an officer's cap or something, because NOW it's serious. NOW he has to actually stand up and DEAL with things.
Her: Ooh
Me: And Herod...okay, what if when they show up at Herod's, he's throwing a huge, trashy Hollywood party?
Like clearly super-expensive but also completely tacky, "check out my $300 leopard-print t-shirt" kind of affair, like the thing you'd expect to see a bunch of reality TV stars attending, everyone's rich but they all look like fancy garbage...there's probably a chocolate fountain that some asshole has their entire face in, everyone's taking selfies, and Herod's probably snorting coke off of a stripper when they bring Jesus in?
Her: Building on that, what if Herod is, like, not /actual/ famous, but, like, Instagram!famous?
So Jesus being there is a thing of like "oh man I'm going to get SO many views!"
If there's a screen in the back it can show like his selfies/posts that are going up as he sings.
"Look who dropped by!” #kingofthejews"
Me: Omg, Instagram!Celebrity Herod...which just gives me the shivering horrors over the idea of internet celebrities being able to have people beheaded on a whim.
And then Jesus just RUINS EVERYTHING by not doing a magic trick for his YouTube subscribers, and he throws a giant man-tantrum about it.
Her: #jokenotlord #nothingbutafraud
Me: Yes perfect.
And then Judas, who's up until now been the most fashionably put-together Apostle, goes running back to the priests to give the silver back, but he's not so put-together anymore...shirt untucked, buttons undone, hair a mess, sunglasses sliding down his face, just an absolute wreck.
Her: Yes good
Me: And the priests toss him out on his face, and he has his breakdown, and pulls the sunglasses off during the "I Don't Know How to Love Him" reprise to mop up his tears, and by the end of it he's just straight-up wiping his nose on his sleeve because he's so beyond caring at that point, and he's got the sunglasses clutched in his hand all the while but he just carelessly drops them as he goes tottering off to find a rope.
Her: Oh no my heart
Me: Naturally when he comes back as a ghost, he's just...completely glam. The glammest thing that ever glammed.
Super-sharp suit, fancy tie, styled hair, sequins, glitter, he practically GLOWS under the stage lights, and (especially if he comes back as demon!Judas instead of angel!Judas) the sunglasses are back, intact and polished and completely hiding his eyes.
Her: Can he reach for his sunglasses a couple times out of habit, but they're not there since he dropped them before he died?
Nevermind you said other things while I was typing that.
Me: ...until he takes them off during the Crucifixion.
Just standing there, staring sadly up at Jesus while he clutches his sunglasses, and through some clever lighting he's not nearly so sparkly anymore.
Her: Hmmm
Okay but
Actually this changes characterization slightly so I don't know, but
Suppose he has the sunglasses, as you said, through Superstar
But then at the very last moment, they're forcibly removed
Like maybe one of the backup dancer ladies just glides by and is like *yoink* before he can react
Me: You mean like he's rocking out, and then when they start nailing Jesus to the cross one of the Soul Sisters yanks them off as they all just twirl off and desert him?
Her: And it syncs up with that abrupt change in music when Superstar switches to Crucifixion
Me: Ooohhhh, I could dig that.
Like he's got that snarky denial thing going on and then he HAS to face what he's done.
Her: Yes, exactly
Me: Maybe he slowly strips off his suit jacket and tie while he's watching Jesus, because it's just not "fun" anymore...it was never fun, it was just something to hide behind.
Her: Aw yes
All while never taking his eyes off Jesus
Me: Just staring up all the while, as he tosses his fancy demon clothes into the shadows.
Her: Mhm mhm
Me: Staring is all he can do, because it's not like he can interact with the other Apostles or Mary at that point. I've seen staging like that with two productions, and it's just devastating every time.
Her: What if he starts to reach out but then remembers they can't see him?
Me: OH OW.
Her: Like it's habit, because they WERE friends, before everything went down, and then... yeah.
Me: He reaches out to them and they just obliviously move away, but Mary's still draped over Jesus weeping, and after sneering at her all musical he finally puts a hand on her shoulder, even if she can't feel it.
Her: Yes good
Like, a lot.
What if Mary Magdalene has lots and lots of friendship bracelets as part of her outfit...
...and all of the Apostles noticeably are also wearing one?
Except Judas, because he wouldn't wear his. Alternately, she tries to give him one during "Everything's Alright," but he just stares at her.
Alternately-alternately, he just stares at her, then notices Jesus watching, and grudgingly lets her put one on his wrist.
Her: :o I see!
...Judas doesn't want one, then sees Jesus take one, then begrudgingly accepts one
Me: Yes, yes good, because Jesus is a good bro and would happily accept Mary's bracelet.
And I've been thinking more about hoodie!Jesus, and the idea is really growing on me.
Like Jesus's outfit consists entirely of this big white hoodie that's AT LEAST two sizes too big, and worn-out jeans with the knees ripped out, and Birkenstocks, because I have a lot of feelings about Jesus in Birkenstocks.
And the overall effect is he looks kind of sloppy, but also SUPER-approachable and cuddly. Maybe ALL of the Apostles look like they got their clothes out of a Goodwill dumpster, except for Judas.
I mean, Judas doesn't need to be a full-on Gucci-douche or anything, but he's noticeably more put-together than the rest of them, because I always feel like people ought to work that "he MIGHT be skimming off the top of the treasury" bit in there, somewhere. And then Jesus can be pointedly referring to his outfit with the "look at the good things YOU'VE got," after he tries to call Mary out as a dumb wasteful hooker with the perfume.
Her: ...I am definitely here for a cuddly Jesus.
Me: He is the CUDDLIEST Jesus. He heals with HUGS.
...also at least one Apostle ruffles Judas's hair during "What's the Buzz?" and Judas just pulls a comb out of his pocket and starts grumpily tidying himself up.
Her: If he heals with hugs, no wonder he gets so overwhelmed when everyone wants healing.
Me: The hugs get very frazzled by the time he's covered in lepers.
And maybe Jesus rarely puts the hood up, maybe it's like a security blanket thing where he pulls it up when he's stressed-out, like right before the lepers show up while he's singing "my time is almost through..." And at the start of "The Last Supper," but he ends up shoving it off again right before he starts calling out Apostles.
And it's up when they drag him in to see Pilate the first time, just so somebody can yank it off to present him to Pilate as "Someone Christ, King of the Jews."
Her: Ooh, yes.
Me: SPEAKING OF PILATE: Okay, we already discussed wanting him dressed like Treize Khushrenada but in Tyrian purple, yes?
What if when they first bring in Jesus, he's behind one of those huge, ornate desks, more or less hip-deep in paperwork?
And they bring in Jesus, and he's just like, "...really? Really? I'm swamped and you bring me a scruffy hobo to deal with? Just...take him to Herod, or something; I've got stuff to do."
But when they bring him back, Pilate's got the cape on, and probably an officer's cap or something, because NOW it's serious. NOW he has to actually stand up and DEAL with things.
Her: Ooh
Me: And Herod...okay, what if when they show up at Herod's, he's throwing a huge, trashy Hollywood party?
Like clearly super-expensive but also completely tacky, "check out my $300 leopard-print t-shirt" kind of affair, like the thing you'd expect to see a bunch of reality TV stars attending, everyone's rich but they all look like fancy garbage...there's probably a chocolate fountain that some asshole has their entire face in, everyone's taking selfies, and Herod's probably snorting coke off of a stripper when they bring Jesus in?
Her: Building on that, what if Herod is, like, not /actual/ famous, but, like, Instagram!famous?
So Jesus being there is a thing of like "oh man I'm going to get SO many views!"
If there's a screen in the back it can show like his selfies/posts that are going up as he sings.
"Look who dropped by!” #kingofthejews"
Me: Omg, Instagram!Celebrity Herod...which just gives me the shivering horrors over the idea of internet celebrities being able to have people beheaded on a whim.
And then Jesus just RUINS EVERYTHING by not doing a magic trick for his YouTube subscribers, and he throws a giant man-tantrum about it.
Her: #jokenotlord #nothingbutafraud
Me: Yes perfect.
And then Judas, who's up until now been the most fashionably put-together Apostle, goes running back to the priests to give the silver back, but he's not so put-together anymore...shirt untucked, buttons undone, hair a mess, sunglasses sliding down his face, just an absolute wreck.
Her: Yes good
Me: And the priests toss him out on his face, and he has his breakdown, and pulls the sunglasses off during the "I Don't Know How to Love Him" reprise to mop up his tears, and by the end of it he's just straight-up wiping his nose on his sleeve because he's so beyond caring at that point, and he's got the sunglasses clutched in his hand all the while but he just carelessly drops them as he goes tottering off to find a rope.
Her: Oh no my heart
Me: Naturally when he comes back as a ghost, he's just...completely glam. The glammest thing that ever glammed.
Super-sharp suit, fancy tie, styled hair, sequins, glitter, he practically GLOWS under the stage lights, and (especially if he comes back as demon!Judas instead of angel!Judas) the sunglasses are back, intact and polished and completely hiding his eyes.
Her: Can he reach for his sunglasses a couple times out of habit, but they're not there since he dropped them before he died?
Nevermind you said other things while I was typing that.
Me: ...until he takes them off during the Crucifixion.
Just standing there, staring sadly up at Jesus while he clutches his sunglasses, and through some clever lighting he's not nearly so sparkly anymore.
Her: Hmmm
Okay but
Actually this changes characterization slightly so I don't know, but
Suppose he has the sunglasses, as you said, through Superstar
But then at the very last moment, they're forcibly removed
Like maybe one of the backup dancer ladies just glides by and is like *yoink* before he can react
Me: You mean like he's rocking out, and then when they start nailing Jesus to the cross one of the Soul Sisters yanks them off as they all just twirl off and desert him?
Her: And it syncs up with that abrupt change in music when Superstar switches to Crucifixion
Me: Ooohhhh, I could dig that.
Like he's got that snarky denial thing going on and then he HAS to face what he's done.
Her: Yes, exactly
Me: Maybe he slowly strips off his suit jacket and tie while he's watching Jesus, because it's just not "fun" anymore...it was never fun, it was just something to hide behind.
Her: Aw yes
All while never taking his eyes off Jesus
Me: Just staring up all the while, as he tosses his fancy demon clothes into the shadows.
Her: Mhm mhm
Me: Staring is all he can do, because it's not like he can interact with the other Apostles or Mary at that point. I've seen staging like that with two productions, and it's just devastating every time.
Her: What if he starts to reach out but then remembers they can't see him?
Me: OH OW.
Her: Like it's habit, because they WERE friends, before everything went down, and then... yeah.
Me: He reaches out to them and they just obliviously move away, but Mary's still draped over Jesus weeping, and after sneering at her all musical he finally puts a hand on her shoulder, even if she can't feel it.
Her: Yes good
